Jim Walsh's Big Hairy Weblog Thingy

Thursday, November 17, 2005

Meanwhile, Alan Colmes is playing Solitaire...

Bill O'Reilly announced this week he was compiling an enemies list of organizations, individuals, and websites, which he feels are “un-American,” are “against our way of life,” and are "dangerous."

Sean Hannity already has a similar “list”… Hannity in fact is known to repeatedly wave paper at cameras and microphones, on which he claims are facts to back up some talking point or another (he has yet to actually show anyone the contents of the paper)…

One supposes we can look forward to O'Reilly doing the same.

As someone once said, I can hear it now...

DREAMY HARP MUSIC AS CAMERA FOCUS OUT TO DREAM SEQUENCE...

SCENE OPENS: Bill O’Reilly, world-renouned television and radio commentator is sitting at a restaurant table, working on his bacon and eggs. Across from him is a Fox executive.

BO: One day you've got me saying there are ninety Al Queda operatives in the Democratic Party...next day it's forty-four, next day it's one hundred and thirty-two...ya know, I think I'd feel better about all this paper-waving if people weren't making such a big deal out of the discrepancy...

FE: Let 'em bicker...as long as it keeps you in the papers, any publicity is good publicity.

BO: Well, couldn't we at least come up with one solid number?

FE: OK, OK...if it'll make you feel better. Now let's see... (Fox Exec gazes intently at the bottle of ketchup on the table)

CUT TO: "The No Spin Zone." O’Reilly is waving a piece of paper in the air...

BO: "I have here in my hands CONCLUSIVE EVIDENCE that there are no less than FIFTY-SEVEN Al Queda operatives inside the Democratic Party..."

(Apologies to Richard Condon and John Frankenheimer)

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