Swing, You Sinnahs!

A little something for your Halloween festivities from YouTube...

Why I Am Not A Voter

"Should I even bother with voting?"

You ask that question of just about any pundit, commentator, celebrity, activist, or (duh) politician, and you will get a resounding "yes" (most likely accompanied by a trite moral lecture full of the usual cliches about fufilling one's civic duty)...

You are about to read a minority opinion.

Mr. Shaffer's opinions on the subject parallel my own very closely. Up until about eight years ago, I too was a regular voter - and I always came away feeling unsatisfied, even guilty, like I had just taken part in some sick, sordid process.

Then I stopped voting - for reasons much like those of Mr. Shaffer. I haven't missed it a bit.

The main point I want to make here is this: if you're gonna vote, at least be sure you're doing it for the right reason. Doing it because some acquaintence, family member or mental-midget celebrity tells you it's your "civic duty" to do so is the wrong reason.

Maybe it's time you kicked the habit...and told the "civic duty" crowd to stick it their collective hats...

Post-Marital Bliss

It all went splendidly Friday. Thanks to those of you who have forwarded your best wishes - and your money.

We rolled tape on the event; watch for it soon...

It's A Gas, Man

About my surgery: a week ago yesterday I had some outpatient surgery, specifically a colonoscopy (my first ever) and repair of two hernias. I just want to say that if you haven't been under the knife in a few years that the procedures, the painkillers, the anesthesia have all advanced by light years since, say, the early seventies, when I last went under the knife.

The advances in anesthesia are for me particularly astounding. As a fifty year-old man, I'm old enough to remember the era when it was common to put you under with ether. This entailed holding you down while somebody held the mask on your face, forcing you to breathe the most godawful-smelling stuff in the universe until you "went under."

When I was six years old I had a particularly traumatic experience involving an incompetent dentist and anesthetic gas. This left me with a deep dread of any medical procedure involving general anesthesia - even though I had several subsequent operations that went just fine by the standards of the day.

Then came last week. I was told the docs planned to use "monitored anesthesia," also known as "conscious sedation." Here's how it worked from my perspective. They got me into my gown and in a bed, started an IV into which they pumped what they told me was some sort of sedative that has amnesia-inducing qualities. After I mellowed out for a while, they wheeled me into the O.R. and started prepping me.

I remember speaking with one of the nurses who was telling me that they had to shave some of the hair off my belly for the hernia procedure. What happened next was like a flash forward in the movies. In a split second I was back on the gurney, wheeling down the hall and the orderly was telling me it was time to go home.

The nurse later told my fiance that one of the medications given me in pre-op was (no joke) a variation on the "date-rape" drug. I can tell you it worked as well as I could have hoped. I don't remember anything about the hernia repair or (thank Gawd) the colonoscopy.

So all my worries about the "gas thing" were for naught; in this particular instance they didn't even have to gas me after I was "under." And I got to go home and start eating again right away.
So if you're got a cuttin' session coming up soon, and it's been a while for ya don't worry. Things are a lot better than they used to be.

Tomorrow...I get married (I'll definitely need general anesthesia for that, huh huh huh). Stay tuned...

Requiem For A Beautiful Blowhard

A radio host named Bob Lassiter died earlier this week.

Now, chances are, even if you're in the biz, or a regular follower of the talk scene, you've never heard of the guy. And that's a tragedy, because Lassiter was one hell of an entertainer.

He was brash. He was sharp. He was a master at getting a rise out of people. He was a bully, a blowhard, and a true original - and the latter is what killed his career. God knows we have our share of bullies and blowhards these days, but originals? Yeah, right.

The industry has barely noticed his passing. Even his old hometown station has given him little mention beyond a perfunctory obituary.

Lassiter was a relic of another era of personality radio...an era when it was more important how entertaining and compelling you were as a host, than how well you conformed to the industry's notions of what "talk radio" was supposed to sound like.

Don't take my word for it. Listen to Lassiter's work and compare what he does to the current crop of journeyman squawkers. The latter group is, for the most part stiff, dull, pandering, totally predictable - but by God, they keep the geezers happy and they don't make trouble for the front office...

There is simply no place in today's spoken-word media for a guy like Bob Lassiter.

That sucks, man.

Back...And On The Mend

Been a while, hasn't it? Well, among other things, I've been "under the knife"...as in surgery. Details in a day or so. No really, I promise. Just as soon as the Percocet wears off...